What If I Am?

by Ryan Trask, Life Coach at Water Street Mission

“God rescued us from dead-end alleys and dark dungeons. He’s set us up in the kingdom of the Son he loves so much, the son who got us out of the pit we were in, got rid of the sins we were doomed to keep repeating.”

Colossians 1:13-14 MSG

This was me. Lost and alone. Without any hope of being found.

So many things got me here. I felt abandoned at home, rejected, hurt by loved ones, and unqualified to be loved.

All of these feelings can make anyone numb. In fact, it can make you reciprocate the same emotions to the ones you love.

I began to feel like this was a never-ending cycle. So without any sight of light at the end of the tunnel, I began to run. I ran so long that I got good at running…from my problems, responsibilities, and loved ones. Isn’t that why we all decided to run?

But when you run for too long you become fatigued. In my mind there was only one thing left to do, end it all. End all the pain, end all the reckless thoughts, and end all the bad memories.

In my running to my end, I felt something running after me. This pursuit felt different. This felt like someone trying to rescue me. But who could care that much?

Everything in me is telling me that I’m not worth saving…

But what if I am?